This is a serious question.

I eat fruit, because I’m told it’s good for me, but is there anyone out there who actually LKES it?

I mean, is there anyone who sits watching X Factor on a Saturday night and goes ‘oooh lets get a bottle of wine and a big dirty bunch of bananas’.

I know a lot of people like strawberry’s which is fair enough because they are nice with heaps of sugar or on cheesecake, but just normal standard boring fruit, does it even have a taste? I’ve never heard anyone in my life say ‘I’m really looking forward to that apple at lunch’.

Or anyone who has a drink and fancies a pear after a night out, which just goes to show why there are not 24 hour fruit stalls over festival leisure park. I just forced myself to eat a banana after my run because they ‘give you energy’ and mid way through I realised I could be eating a block of polystyrene and not really notice the difference.

I like fruit flavour. Fruit flavour sweets are AWESOME. give me a pack of Fruitella and I’m anyone’s (alright, two packs. Ok. 4) but why does actual FRUIT not taste as good as FRUIT FLAVOURED stuff.

Theres been a lot about Genetically Modified food in the news today. Can I just give you a piece of advice?

Stop turning tomatoes fucking purple and make a banana taste of something, and the obesity epidemic will be a distant memory like the time Madonna showed her tit.