How To Spring Clean Like A Pro

That season is upon us. Clocks going forward, jumper goes on, jumper goes off and the daily struggle as to whether it’s socially acceptable to wear sunglasses yet or not. March not only symbolizes the upcoming Easter Bank Holiday, but also a sign that things are going to get warmer.

‘Spring Cleaning ‘ is an age old practice that no one really knows for sure the origins of. Some people say Iran, some people say Egypt, some people say Jesus told every to get their houses in order before he was resurrected, because he wasn’t going to come back if your living room was still a shit hole.  (That last one may be a bit made up).

So yeah, there you go, Spring. We are all going to run around like headless chickens having a sort out. Here’s a few of my tips to keep you ‘Spring Clean Sane’

Don’t Overwhelm Yourself. 


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Spring cleaning can be a tad stressful, so there’s not point in thinking you’ll get the whole house done in four hours. Rather than risk a Spring cleaning breakdown, try and do one room or area at a time. Even things as small as doing one cupboard each day is better than doing nothing and ending up on one of those programmes about hoarders. Set aside a couple of hours every here and there where you can, and try not to have plans for a few hours after, as once you start sorting through your old junk like your photo’s of when platform trainers and jellies were in and your Tamagotchi you are going to be longer than you think.

Be Ruthless. 


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Let’s take a moment here to think about holidays. On holiday, you enjoy 7 to 14 days of sheer bliss, and guess what? You actually manage to live yes YOU actually manage to live without that inflatable microphone from that great night out 3 years ago and those flip flops that cut your toes but you might wear one day and that shower cap someone bought you as a joke. Yes, you can actually survive without these in your life. Who knew? If you are going to Spring clean, you NEED to be ruthless, as this is why you are doing it in the first place. As humans, we attach sentimental value to all kinds of crap that brings no benefit to our life. A cluttered house leads to a cluttered mind. If you REALLY feel like you can’t chuck it, put it in the shed or loft so you still know it’s there.

Be Realistic. 


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As well as being ruthless, you need to find balance and be realistic. If something is broken or you literally never use it then of course bin it, but don’t just aimlessly bin things then shit yourself when you can’t find them. It’s no good binning your entire room then wondering why you can’t brush your hair. A great way to achieve this is count how many times you have used the thing in the last week, month, then six months. If you haven’t used it in the last 6 months, you can probably live without it.

Get some help in. 


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No one will give you an honest opinion of what fits and looks nice and what makes you look like one of those sausages wrapped in bacon like your mates. Get the girls round and have a Prosecco while you are Spring cleaning. They probably won’t fancy sticking around for the actual spraying and cleaning bit, but at least you’ll have some back up deciding what’s junk and what you need to keep, and what you should take on Cash in the Attic.

Make Some Money. 


Honest to god, some people will buy anything. One mans trash and all that. I once did a boot sale and these women were literally fighting to get my old tacky plates from when I was about 2 that had all flowers on them. Everyone has different tastes and sizes, so you could easily make a big of cash for your unwanted items.

Boot sales are a great shout, but you have to get up mega early. If you are lazy, like me, just put all of your stuff on It is true that sellers fee’s and postage have got a bit pricey in recent years, but if you sign up and can wait to off load your junk, you can look out for deals Ebay do where they don’t charge any sellers fee’s on certain days.

Remember to give a clear, honest description of your items and back it up with loads of pictures. You can also sell ‘bundles’ if you want to save on postage.


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